Authors Note: I wrote this poem about the quote about a lecture Mr. Johnson gave us about living in the moment. The quote I used as inspiration for this piece was Today is life - the only life you are sure of". ~Dale Carnegie
Silent wind catches rustling sounds,
Cinnamon scents of autumn around.
Bitters air whipping, tornadoes tangling auburn strands
Slowly down rigid steep hills, steady steps expand.
Harmoniously combining with my thoughts sturdily
skidding to a stop, balancing my feet firmly.
Listen-
Live--
Making the best of the moments of today.
Is there a tomorrow? --
Will winter come?
This is a great poem. I really loved the way it flows, and how you related it to a quote. I thought in the beginning it was going to rhyme because the first two lines did,but it turned out not to. It was still good though. The only thing is that you may want to add an author's note in the beginning to help people to understand it a little better. Otherwise, nice job Caitlin!
ReplyDeleteI like this poem and how you made it relate to something we talked about in class. I don't think you need the last stanza, but if you like it then keep it. Great job!!!
ReplyDeleteThis poem is really well written, and it has a really good message to it. I love how you describe everything so well. My only suggestion would be to work on the puntcuation a little bit more because i feel it could flow a little bit better, but it is still easy to read. Really good job!
ReplyDeleteI liked how at the beginning of the poem there was rhyming and I thought you were going to continue that but then it stopped after the first two lines. I don't know if that was an accident but it would have been cool if you had the rhyming. I thought the poem was actually very good though and it flowed very well. Good job!
ReplyDeleteWow, that was a great poem. I love how you made it seem like it rhymed but t wasn't to sing songy. I love this vision and it was very interesting to read. Great job. I think it would be cool if you turned this into another piece of writing like an essay or a short story.
ReplyDeleteI liked this poem alot! It flowed really well and it really captured the moment. I loved how it related to what we talked about in class and it really described it well, like in the first stanza it almost captures a moment in time. I don't know if that makes much sense but I loved your writing...
ReplyDeleteWhat an amazing poem to read. The rhyming gave it sort of a sing-song feel even though it is quite a serious poem. It gives you a different outlook on loving your life to the fullest by taking you to a place where realization takes place that what we are doing with ourselves isn't a game and we should consider what to do before taking that leap of faith, thus the lines "Harmoniously combining with my thoughts sturdily skidding to a stop, balancing my feet firmly."
ReplyDelete